Afterall, we appear to have a number of things in common. We both believe that immigration is a really scary thing and will eat your children, that people with skin darker than our own palid complections are not to be trusted and that the Earth is a flat disk resting on a giant tower of space turtles stacked one on top of the other, a billion miles high. The scientifically minded amongst you may ask: But what does the turtle at the bottom stand on? Well that doesn't matter right now.
What does matter is that the BNP are marginalised in today's European and local elections.
To guide you on your misinformed ventures through the turgid wasteland that is European and local politics, we will be taking a look today at the BNP's recently published 10 reasons why you should vote for them instead of an actual political party.
Reason 1: Workfare not Welfare - BNP Housing and Welfare Policy.
The BNP believes that everyone who claims benefits is a scrounging scumbag. Under a BNP Government, anyone claiming that they are unable to work would be forced to 'complete a certain number of hours of work per week', presumably by some kind of modern day Gulag. A bit like Stalin's Russia. It seems that the BNP is a fan of Stalinst welfare.
And how would the BNP generate funds to build these
If anyone comes to this country as a refugee or asylum seeker because their life is at risk in their country of origin, they will not be given housing or financial help in Britain. Instead, they will be sent back to die, be tortured, persecuted or whatever. The BNP doesn't care.
We may disapprove of foreign people, but saying they should bugger off to die is a bit much.
Reason 2: British Soldiers Defending Britain - BNP Defence Policy.
One of the first things the BNP would do if elected would be to stage an almighty witch hunt against anyone and everyone connected with the Iraq and Afghanistan wars. Regardless of your opinion of those particular conflicts, locking up your political opponents seems a bit too Stalinist (again) for our taste.
The BNP is also keen on never committing British forces to 'any conflict which does not directly affect British interests'. Presumably this vague statement means the BNP would not deploy troops unless another country - the French most likely - were to turn up on our shores waving dirty big sticks and threatening to invade Parliament. This brand of isolationism would in fact weaken Britain's position as a global power, damage international relations and lead to an increase in indirect threats to national security through the destabilisation of foreign countries where anti-Western sentiment runs particularly high. The BNP would, therefore, spell disaster for Britian's security.
Unsurprisingly, the BNP would also seek an end to British involvement in peacekeeping in war-torn countries. Aside from the clear contempt for human life that isn't white skinned or British, isolating oneself from problems overseas increases the risk of political and military volatility which could indirectly pose a threat to our country.
Reason 3: First Class Health Service for a First World Nation - BNP Health Policy.
"TB and AIDS are on the increase as a result of immigration", say the BNP. There is no evidence for this whatsoever. The BNP may be horrified to find that TB and AIDS would still be a problem even if immigration was to be completely prevented.
"British doctors and nurses are unable to find work in the NHS because we are importing medical staff (often with questionable qualifications) from the Third World". If Britain was to stop hiring medical staff from abroad, the NHS would face a catastrophic recruitment shortage. Foreign doctors do not have questionable qualifications. If you want less doctors and nurses in the NHS, and more death and disease, vote BNP.
BNP health policy is to 'Replace 100,000 NHS bureaucrats with doctors, nurses and dentists'. There is already a recruitment crisis in the NHS. The BNP want to further reduce the number of doctors in Britain by preventing non-British doctors working here. Can you see the inherent flaw in the BNP's logic?
The BNP wants you to get sick and die. Even The Quail doesn't want that.
The BNP say '“Citizenship” lessons are a euphemism for political indoctrination.' Instead, they should be replaced with BNP Citizenship lessons where, presumably, people will learn how to wear jackboots and distrust people who look different to them.
Children should be caned. 'Old fashioned literacy' and 'old fashioned maths' should be reintroduced, whatver they are. Have a look at any BNP supporting website or blog to see how trendy modern teaching methods have failed; they can't spell or construct an argument for shit.
A cool new version of the Hitler youth led by Billy Brit should be introduced into Britain, according to the BNP. "The introduction of a compulsory Community Award Scheme for all school-leavers to teach them work ethics and social and community values. This would consist of work caring for the elderly or handicapped people, or environmental or heritage restoration projects, or military training."
We can't say we really agree with conscription, beating children and compulsory brainwashing. Sounds a tad Nazi, and not very good for Britain. We don't want other countries pointing and laughing at us do we?
A simple one. The BNP would reintroduce everybody's favourite spectator sport, executions, and put an end to 'political correctness' within the police force, somehow [unspecified, not an actual policy or framework, just a vague set of ideals that may or may not have been drawn up on the back of a fag packet]
Of course, such strict measures only apply to non BNP members. The BNP are in fact big fans of crime and corruption; just ask Robert Bailey about his inability to drive while sober, or Nick Griffin about his convictions for assault and race hate, or Richard Barnbrook about murder.
BNP crime and justice policies would make Britain the convict pit of Europe. We don't want to be the new Australia now.
Wahey! Here's what it's all about! The panacea for all of Britain's ills.
The BNP would deport everybody who isn't white, whose family hasn't lived here for several hundred years. This would prevent anything bad from ever happening, rectify everything bad that has ever happened, and probably cost nothing at all.
Oh, wait. Is that it? Is that 'the big plan'? To get rid of everyone? But...that...doesn't make any sense. Surely it can't be that the one, single idea that the BNP actually have makes no sense whatsoever and could never be implemented?
It is? Oh. Sounds a bit Fascist. I was expecting something a little more engaging.
'Protection of British companies from unfair foreign imports...promotion of domestic competition...Increased taxes on companies which outsource work abroad'. This worked really well in the early 20th century, so the BNP will be reintroducing protectionism to ensure that Britain never recovers from recession.
Want to buy a Sony TV? You can't. Like Italian food? Well, it'll cost you. But fish and chips will be a couple of pence cheaper...oh wait, no it won't because Britain doesn't have enough fisheries to sustain demand. Hmm.
We can't condone the BNP's uber-socialist economic policies on the grounds that they're just too darn Red.
'Simple' is the operative word in the BNP's 'Foreign Affairs Policy', which actually just consists of not having any affairs with foreigners.
This is classic BNP non-politics; policy which proposes nothing, relying instead on simply doing the opposite of whatever it is the mainstream parties would do. BNP policy is devised not by formulating plans or generating ideas, but by taking current strategy and saying 'Nah'.
This is anti-politics, anti-integration, regressive and harmful to our country, and betrays an inability to seriously run a political party, let alone a country. Mr Griffin and his cohorts have not the faintest idea of how Europe or indeed any international relations work, evidenced by their pie-in-the sky, unworkable soundbite policy points (all *cough* four of them)
Tee hee! Only kidding. The BNP actually hates democracy. Invented by those slimy Greeks wasn't it.
The BNP would 'Abolish “anti-discrimination” laws' and 'abolish the “Human Rights Act”' if it were to be elected. Yep, it's pretty much all a case of abolishing things and taking away peoples' liberties. 'Britain's most democratic party'! Hahahaha, just kidding!
Reason 10: The BNP is Britain’s Only True Green Party.
See, the BNP couldn't really think of a tenth one. 'Free ice creams for all?' was suggested, along with making the North Sea strawberry flavoured. 'Nah, let's say some wank about the environment to try and get a couple of sandal-wearers on board', said Nick.
But they couldn't really think of anything other than 'the BNP is the only party to recognise that overpopulation - whose primary driver is immigration - is the cause of the destruction of our environment.'
Not corporate irresponsibility. Not fossil fuels. Not anything to do with cars! It's the immigrants again. So really this one is covered off in Reason 6: stop all immigration and you save the environment! Bam, done.
Oh, and also, ban halal and kosher stuff because that probably causes carbon dioxide or something too.
So there you have it. The BNP's 10 reasons to vote for them don't really make any sense. At all.
Being the staunch nationalists that we are here at The Quail, we couldn't possily recommend voting for this viciously anti-British party. Their ideas would actively harm Britain, corrode our national security, weaken our economy, destroy our health service, bring our welfare system to its knees. Even if you're a fat faced, sweaty, knuckle dragging, racist shit, you'd still be better of voting for someone who won't ruin your country. You can vote Tory or Labour and still be a racist moron; they won't stop you.
If you wish to protest against the excesses and corruption of the current Government, do so. Vote Conservative or Liberal Democrat, indeed, vote for anyone who has policies that MAKE. SENSE. The BNP have absolutely no idea how to run a party, let alone a country.
Don't vote for a party whose only actual policy is to get rid of people who don't have white skin. Afterall, who could you complain about then and blame for taking your house, wife and job? And even The Mail knows they don't really do that anyway.
If you love this country, you won't vote for the British Nazi Party.