Monday, 10 November 2008

Get Him

This is simply a step too far.

After outraging bus enthusiasts by wantonly exploding a routemaster, offending Britain's sensitive lorry driving community, and, worst of all, earning more money than you, Jeremy Clarkson has sparked fresh outrage and horror by making an obscene hand gesture at an American police officer (or 'cop').

Critics immediately called for a ban on all TV gesticulations and the suspension of Clarkson for three months without pay, just like that other presenter we don't like.

The BBC is now facing demands to fit straight-jackets and muzzles to all of its presenters, broadcast programmes without sound lest audiences hear swears, and to issue all license fee payers with free light-deflecting spectacles to use if something rude is about to happen. An email alert system, warning taxpayers of impending rudeness so they can tune in and subsequently complain about offensive programming they might otherwise have missed, is also being looked into.

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