Thursday, 30 July 2009

Fury as soft jobs shorten dole queues

New Labour was accused of trying to stem Britain's growing unemployment problem yesterday, as it emerged that fully paid jobs are to be dished out to people who don't even have jobs.

The cynical ploy to massage embarrassing unemployment figures will see TENS of thousands of 'soft' public-sector jobs created in a £1billion scheme to provide work for the feckless. In a perverse attempt to further frustrate the fine traditions of Great Britain a total of 150,000 taxpayer funded jobs are to be created for lazy layabouts, who probably don’t want them anyway - paid for by you.

The scheme, spearheaded by Yvette Cooper, will see ridiculously easy new positions created for meddling Social Workers, Teaching Assistants with cushy holiday entitlement and Carers whose only responsibilities are wiping arses and taking care of society's most vulnerable people.

But critics have branded the move 'indulgent.'

The TaxPayers’ Alliance insta-quote machine seethed nonsensically: 'The public sector has failed to cut back in the recession...soft jobs like Social Workers or Home Carers would be indulgent even in good economic times, let alone in the current climate. When times are tough we have to make sure they are even tougher for the poor and the vulnerable.'

Also: The Mail on the same topic.

The Spectator brands the screamsheets' treatment of the subject 'sneering philistine right-wing pomposity'.

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  1. Next you'll be telling me that young people will be encouraged to train and increase their skills before they enter a highly competative job market?


  2. Yeah, and, like, who'll be paying for that, I wonder????????? *Belch*

  3. I'm rather confused as to the definition of 'non job' the Mail uses.

    If they mean 'a job which contributes nothing to society and is a waste of resources' then they should be letting Liz Jones go off and spend more time with her horses.

    If they mean 'a public sector position we don't really need' then surely Dacre should be demanding cuts in the military, a reduction of arts council funding for opera and the abolition of the Royals.

    I guess what they really mean is 'a job for the 98% of the population we don't like'. Though is more like 99% as they seem to hate men (who aren't rich) now as well as women.

  4. Apparently being a sports coach is a "non-job". Well there goes any chance of anybody British winning anything in well...anything sporting in the future!

    Interesting that cook is also a "non-job", but flipping burgers isn't. Ironic considering the years of training needed to be an A-grade burger flipper.

  5. According to right wing ranters the only value a job has is how much wealth it creates. I'd prefer to spend an evening with someone who works in a forest or at the Southbank centre then a snout in the trough city tosspot.