Sunday 25 January 2009

Quail Lite: Jonathan Ross Makes Joke

Jonathan Ross yesterday presented his first radio show since his tabloid enforced suspension two months ago.

Ross and his producer made a joke about an old person, which nobody found offensive.

The News of the World said today, in an article titled 'Ross does sick OAP sex gag':

'The mega-bucks star’s crude joke about sex with an 80-year-old woman infuriated listeners'

Similarly outraged, The Mail said:

'The BBC was today fending off calls for Ross to be sacked after yesterday's broadcast' an article snappily titled 'New calls for Jonathan Ross to be sacked after he makes sick joke about sex with a pensioner on his radio return'.

The BBC said:

'The BBC did not receive any complaints over the incident on Saturday'

Sir Michael Lyons, chairman of the BBC Trust, said:

'You’re not going to expect me to make any comment on this, are you?'

Interestingly, the BBC has now revealed it has received 18 complaints about the 'incident', after the 'shocking' and 'vile' dialogue was printed word-for-word in the Mail on Sunday and The News of the World, which bravely allowed the disgusting comments to be carried on their respective pages, reaching a far greater audience that the actual broadcast did.

Presumably all 18 complainants heard the broadcast themselves but were unable to complain when the show was on air due to outrage induced catatonia.

See next week's Quail on Sunday for the same article, as we tiresomely fearlessly ask the same questions again and again: Should Ross be hung, when will the licence fee be abolished, and who will think of the children? And what about Bob?

* Update *

It's up to 25 complaints now, and the article's been rewritten and retitled. So that's seven genuine, bona-fide listeners who definitely heard the broadcast but decided not to complain until they could be certain it was offensive by reading it in the papers. That's what they're there for: to tell people how offended they are. A valuable public service.


  1. My my, The Sun and Daily Mail really ARE desperate to give the BBC a kicking aren't they?

    I wonder why they tear into the Beeb so much?

    Hmm, its not as if they would gain anything if the BBC was abolished, is it..... ?

    Why does the BBC not just come out and tell both of those comics to fuck right off? I wouldn't mind my tax money being used to give both rags a severe kicking. Put a PI out on the streets to follow R****** W*** for a week and see how much gak she hoovers up her nose for example...

    Why the BBC is taking pelters from one Nazi-supporting rag and another that accepts false anti-muslim stories *Glen Jenvey, cough cough* verbatim, fuck knows.

  2. I think am actually in love with you

  3. Scott: I used to think it was because of the beeb's plans to expand into regional news, which would have severely eaten into Northcliffe's local press revenues.

    But as that was blocked by the competition commission, fuck knows. I actually think they still see the BBC as some big bad symbol of socialism, coz, liek, the proles pay for it and stuff.

    Davee Gee: I love you too.

  4. Not content with printing the transcript the press have also apparently tracked down the subject of the joke, to ensure some offence is taken, perhaps, and to kick blissful ignorance in the face.

    As for the other parts of the media having a vested interest in the abolition of the licence fee, I can't help but think "be careful what you wish for". Do they really want to be competing with a privately-funded BBC for that ever-dwindling pool of advertising revenue?

  5. I wonder whether the 'victim's' son would ever have heard about the joke if the Mail/Sun/NotW/Metro whoever hadn't rang them up and repeated the whole thing?

    Good point on a privately funded BBC. I imagine without the licence fee they'd be freer to merge with C4, Five and/or any other number of smaller networks. What would The Mail make of that?